Out of the box

I have nothing to do so I decided to create my last post for this month of October. I am currently in a internet cafe waiting for almost one hour for my brother's cellphone. Well, my bro's cell just got a little crazy and needs a little bit of tuning. I was the one who bought the phone so I have the burden of getting it fixed. And as a good brother, I traveled for almost 3 hours (I reside in Pampanga and it is exactly 2 hours to get to Manila, and from Manila I need to travel for about one hour to get to Mall of Asia where there is a service center for my bro's cell) And yes, finally, I arrived in this Mall but the great news is that, I need to wait for another 3 hours to know the status of the cellular phone. I have no where to go since I already spend all of my savings last time I went out. I can't even window shop since I usually window shop with money,, hehehe.. i am actually left with one choice, to go to a net cafe and spend 3 hours watching videos in youtube, friendster, and nonsense browsing. I am really pissed off right now! I have no money and when I don't have money, I can't do anything. This the greatest disadvantage of semestral breaks, no allowance, no money... Honestly, I can't even buy myself a cup of coffee from any coffee shop.. haha.. poor poor... Still waiting for 10 more minutes... Got to go guys...

A new day... I'm finally going home...

After the previuous rant.. I feel a lot better now. Expressing all my feelings yesterday was a good therapy. Now, I feel light. And finally, I am going home.. After the exams, lectures. homeowrk and many more, i am going back home. I will be having 3 weeks of vacation for all the schoolwork. I know I don't deserve this break.. For what reason? Too many to mention. Yet, I am excited to go home. I want to taste home cook meals, specifically, my nanay's cooking. I am looking forward to be sleeping in my bed with all my pillows and the cool air of my aircon. Excited to watch all the shows I want until midnight. And I won't forget, to see my makukulit pamangkin. I am actually all packed up, carrying my bag in my lap while typing my temporary last post here in Manila..

Time to refresh, I need all the energy i can get for next semester.....

frustration... frus-tration...

It is really hard when you bump into a problem... and if that problem takes the confidence in you.. Well, i recently "bumped" into a catastrophe... Unfortunately, i didn't pass my chem 150 subject, physical chemistry. I know it is my fault considering the fact that I wasn't able to do my best. The stubbornness got the best out of me. I easily gave up on the subject because I experienced a hard time studying and understanding the lessons. I also had a problem with one of the professors teaching the subject.

I can blame myself for eternity, but it will not change anything. I am still a failure. For the third time!!! I hate myself. Right now, I just want to go out on a busy street with all the cars rushing and blowing their horns, and just shout, shout 'till my lungs explode. Shout 'till I removed this feeling... I continue to disappoint my family, my mother, my siblings... I continue to disappoint myself! Still committing the same mistakes, over and over again. I am tired of failing... I am tired of being a failure.. I hate the feeling of being dumb and worthless..

You Give Little Love...

I was watching t.v. and I heard this song in a commercial of Coca-cola. It immediately caught my ears, and soon, I was already singing it. It has this catchy tune and also a great message. Just wanna share the lyrics... It is a great, great song...

You could have been anything that you wanted to be
And its not too late to change
I'd be delighted to give it some thought
Maybe you'll agree we really ought 2-3-4...

We could have been anything that we wanted to be
Yes, that decision was ours
It's been decided
We're weaker divided
Let friendship double up our powers

We could of been anything that we wanted to be,
And I'm not saying we should,
But if we try it we'd learn to abide it
We could be the best at being good guys
Flowers on the earth
Who can even guess how much
A real friend is worth?
Good guys shake an open hand
Maybe we'll be trusting
If we try to understand
No doubt about it
It must be worth while
Good friends to tend to make you smile
We could of been anything that we wanted to be
Yes, that decision was ours
It's been decided
We're weaker divided
Let friendship double up our powers
You give a little love and it all comes back to you
la la la la la la la
You know your gonna be remembered for the things that you say and do
la la la la la la la

(repeat and fade)